DO!!! THE 1⃣3⃣ ATTRIBUTES OF MERCY
VIDUI
Hashem didn't say, "Teach the Jewish people to SAY the 13 Middos" - rather: "Teach them to DO the 13 Middos!" It's not enough to just mindlessly rattle off the 13 Attributes of Mercy; rather, we must try to imitate Hashem's 13 Middos in our own daily interactions.
After the Jewish people sinned with the Golden Calf, Hashem taught Moshe about His 13 Attributes of Mercy as a way to earn forgiveness for the Jewish people. This is the list that we recite many times on Yom Kippur, beginning with "Hashem, Hashem, Keil, Rachum V'Chanun... Hashem is all-powerful, compassionate, merciful, gracious..."
The Gemara [1] writes: "Hashem taught Moshe the 13 Attributes of Mercy, saying: Whenever the Jewish people sin, they should do this procedure before Me, and I will forgive them."
On a basic level, this means that whenever we recite this list of 13 Middos, Hashem will forgive us. But the Sifsei Chaim [2] points out something much deeper:
Hashem didn't say, "Teach the Jewish people to SAY the 13 Middos" - rather: "Teach them to DO the 13 Middos!" It's not enough to just mindlessly rattle off the 13 Attributes of Mercy; rather, we must try to imitate Hashem's 13 Middos in our own daily interactions.
Hashem is Erech Apayim - He has tremendous patience. We, too, should have patience when people take a long time to understand what we're saying, or when they take a long time to apologize after they have hurt us. Hashem is Rav Chessed - He does abundant kindnesses. We, too, should actively seek out opportunities to do chessed for others. Hashem forgives our sins even when we mess up over and over. We, too, must forgive other people even when they make the same mistakes repeatedly.
If we emulate Hashem's 13 Middos in our relationships with family and friends, He promises to mirror our behavior and deal mercifully with us, too.
If you feel like saying something angry or hurtful, hold yourself back from saying it. (KEIL – קל)
When you see someone in pain, do whatever you can to sympathize or alleviate their suffering in some way. (RACHUM – רחום)
Demonstrate patience for other people. Or, if someone angers you, have patience - don't react immediately. Give yourself time to cool off before responding. (ERECH APAYIM – ארך אפיים)
Do "free" favors for people or offer a smile or compliment "just because" ... because YOU want to be a nice person, regardless of whether they deserve it or not. (RAV CHESSED – רב חסד)
Be consistent, dependable, loyal, and reliable. Follow through with your commitments, and stick to your word. (EMES – אמת)
If someone does a favor for you, find a way to pay them back or at least express sincere appreciation. (NOTZEIR CHESSED L'ALAFIM – נוצר חסד לאלפים)
If someone apologizes to you, accept their apology and grant them forgiveness. (V'NAKEH – ונקה)